“By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong” -- Charles Wadsworth
People need a teacher, to study ourselves, for it is impossible to learn about ourselves. But what is a teacher? Is it always a noun or can it be a verb? Is it a person? Is it an event, tragic or enlightening? A higher being or a great ordeal? I am going to start with what I believe to be the first great teacher. On the occasion of my son’s 26th birthday, here is some wisdom I would like to share with him and anyone else. These are things that I learned from my foremost teacher, my Dad, which I did not even realize at the time deeply were soaking and embedding into my psyche.
· Sometimes things are just shitty and you have to
deal with it. I probably would have learned this without my Dad, but it sure
helped me to prepare for those times. Also, you don’t have to spread that crap
to other people to make yourself feel better. Again, deal with it.
· You can find peace and quiet in nature if you
run to it with that purpose.
· It doesn’t have to be brand new to make you
happy, like the commercials try to convince you of. New can be relative. In
fact, if you play hard and break things like Dad and I did, it felt less
painful when it happened. Which leads to my next point.
· Learn to fix things. Fix them to save money, get
out of jam, use as an opportunity to obtain more tools, impress the lady in
your life with your skills or just to learn how things work. After all if it is broke and you can't fix it what have you lost?
· Have fun with people and tell little flavorful
lies to spice up a fishing story or any other tale that needs a little “color”
to make it more interesting. It is best to not have pictures or videos of these
stories as photographic evidence just ruins them. As you once said to me, you
were “very suspicious” of my stories. The wisdom of an eight year old.
· Admit you are wrong when you are wrong and if it
helps to be a bit wrong even when you are right, be wrong. Consider the
situation carefully, like one with your spouse. It makes a huge difference
long-term.
· Don’t only have friends your own age. Learn from
older men what they have to offer you in terms of history. Have younger friends
so you can be reminded of the fact that you were once younger as well. It is
incredible how differences in just a few years and a few life changes can make
in perspective.
I know you really tried hard to not listen to “Your Old Man”
and that was perfectly fine by me. I tried not to listen to my Dad as well. I
knew you heard despite you best efforts to not listen. But you will remember my
words down the road when you least expect it, like I do now. And Daily. I hope mine
will ring a tune that you will remember with fondness.
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